Sorry I’ve been a bad blogger.

I’ve been thinking about writing this post for a while but I just didn’t feel ready to share my story with you until now. I feel like I’ve been a bad blogger over the last few months and I wanted to apologise and give you a little bit of an explanation as to why the site went offline last year and why I’ve been a little inconsistent with posts lately.

I know I don’t usually write personal posts on Lipstick & Cake but my life has changed dramatically in the last year and it affected the blog a great deal. I’m not looking for sympathy or pity, I just wanted to let you know why Lipstick & Cake has been going through these changes and maybe, just maybe, by sharing my story I’ll be able to help someone who might be going through a similar experience.

Last year my husband and I split up. It was a trial separation to start with but we’ve since decided that we won’t be getting back together. Whilst I’m extremely lucky to be going through a very amicable break up, it is still the saddest and most horrendous experience I have ever been through and I wouldn’t wish it upon anyone. It’s not just the marriage breakdown itself that’s painful, but also how others have dealt with (or not dealt) with our news. Whilst divorce is unfortunately common these days, there still seems to be a lot of judgement passed and it can be embarrassing, especially when you’re the first in your group of friends (and grade at school) to go through this. Whilst incredibly difficult and sad, I know that my ex and I made the right decision and we’re both happier for it.

For a while there I was able to continue blogging and it was a good distraction, but then it all got a little too hard and I didn’t have the energy or passion to do it (or much else for that matter) so I went offline for a few months. However, during my separation I did manage to complete Marie Forleo’s B-School which was one of the best things I’ve done. Whilst I initially started Lipstick & Cake as a hobby, I soon realised how much I loved blogging and hoped that one day I could turn it into a full-time career. B-School showed me how I could do that, how I could turn this dream job into a real job and it also gave me the confidence to take another giant leap  – late last year I decided to leave my job and follow a few dreams which included blogging full-time and also travelling the world. Eight months later I have completely redesigned the site, I have lived in LA for four months and am now back in Sydney (for now) and can see my site and my business growing bigger and better every day.

Whilst I am a lot happier and my blogging passion had returned to almost 100%, there were a few tough days where I’d wake up and be unable to get my shit together enough to push out a post. I’ve been sitting on a newsletter for weeks, my inbox was getting out of control, I’ve missed a few Friday Favourites and have a huge backlog of articles that need to be published. I was feeling terribly guilty and overwhelmed and I didn’t know how I was going to kick it.

But, thankfully last Thursday afternoon something happened…I guess you could call it an epiphany. I just  suddenly realised that I didn’t want to be sad anymore and I didn’t want to continue going through a roller coaster of feelings and moods and let them effect the blog. I love this blog and I love my readers and whilst it’s taken a while I’m finally ready to put my head down bum up and grow this thing!

So, I sincerely apologise for the inconsistency shown on this blog over the last 9 months and I thank you for being so patient with me. I promise that Lipstick & Cake is going to get bigger and better from here on out and I will send out that damn newsletter THIS WEEK!

Anyway… as I mentioned earlier this isn’t a pity post, I felt dishonest keeping this from you as I share so much of my life with you and felt like I was living a lie by not opening up and sharing what I’m going through. I am very lucky to have so many wonderful readers who have all been so patient and lovely and very supportive of me and Lipstick & Cake.

To all of those out there who have been through a relationship break down, snaps to you. This shit is hard!

To those of you currently going through it, I feel for you and am here if you need an ear…or a shoulder.. or be distracted by food.

If you know someone going through this, I know you feel like it could be awkward to say something but you have no idea how much it will mean to that person, even if you just send them a text saying ‘Thinking of you’… this is a very lonely time and your friend(s) need all the support they can get.

And finally, to my family and friends who are reading – THANK YOU! I am so lucky to have you. You have definitely helped me get through this tough time and I owe you cookies, babysitting duties and/or lots of cups of tea.

Thank you for taking the time out to read this, I promise I have lots of yummy recipes and fun posts coming for you this week. Stay tuned!

Love Steph x


34 Responses to “Sorry I’ve been a bad blogger.”

  1. May 22, 2014 at 4:16 pm, Kimbo said:

    Beautifully said gorgeous girl. Well I’m hoping I’ve been there for you cause I do have some baby sitting dates… No really you’re amazing, strong and always moving forward. Better to take time to grieve and deal than bottle it up. Xx


    • May 22, 2014 at 4:46 pm, LipstickandCake said:

      Haha let me have them (the dates), I’d be more than happy to look after my little friend! Thank you, you have been an amazing friend xxxx


  2. May 17, 2014 at 5:07 am, Julie @ memybestandi said:

    Oh Steph so sad – but sounds like you are coming through the woods now. Hugs, wine & & chocolate to you lovely xx


    • May 19, 2014 at 10:36 pm, LipstickandCake said:

      Thank you so much Julie. Definitely coming through the woods thankfully. I’ll take those hugs, wine and chocolate! Hope you’re having a lovely trip x


  3. May 16, 2014 at 5:47 pm, Cara Phillips said:

    We’re lucky to have you! So incredibly proud of you beautiful, you’re an amazing friend and I’m so excited for all the adventures that lay ahead! xx


    • May 22, 2014 at 2:39 pm, LipstickandCake said:

      Thank you gorgeous, and thank you for being there for me xxx


  4. May 15, 2014 at 8:40 pm, Serena | Pretty Fluffy said:

    Beautifully written post Steph. Really wishing you and Lipstick & Cake nothing but the very best as you move forward xxx


  5. May 14, 2014 at 1:08 pm, Kylie @ Shabby Sisters said:

    Thank you for sharing. How difficult it must have been to write and then post. But all is does is further cement what a beautiful and honest person you are. Something that comes through your blog (which looks fabulous)! Can’t wait to follow you on the next part of your journey. Kx


    • May 14, 2014 at 8:50 pm, LipstickandCake said:

      Thank you Kylie! Thank you so much for your lovely words, they mean so much! xx


  6. May 13, 2014 at 5:58 am, Jen Bishop said:

    My goodness, you have nothing to apologise about! But a very honest and worthwhile post nonetheless. Having split up with an ex-fiance before moving to Oz 7 years ago, I know a little of where you’re coming from. Other people’s reactions, not least my dad’s, who just couldn’t handle what other people were going to think (when all I wanted was for him to tell me everything was going to be ok), were pretty hard to take at times, as well as the fear of embarrassment (as it turns out, your real friends will not judge you and will support whatever makes you happy) etc. Good for you for being brave enough to get out of a relationship that wasn’t right for you. I know that would have been really hard. And your blog is looking great. I wish you all the best in making it your job. I wouldn’t want to do anything else! Jen x


    • May 13, 2014 at 5:26 pm, LipstickandCake said:

      Thanks Jen! Yes, thankfully the judgement and embarrassment has been minimal, the anticipation was probably the worst bit.
      Thank you, absolutely love working on it and I totally agree, I wouldn’t want to do anything else. x


  7. May 12, 2014 at 10:02 pm, Casey said:

    Sending lots of kind thoughts your way x


  8. May 12, 2014 at 9:14 pm, KB said:

    What a brave and honest post Steph. Really impressed by your honesty and how well written the above was. Something to be very proud of and as everyone who has commented said – you are very brave to put the above out there. Congratulations for doing so and I look forward to your new lease on life 🙂


    • May 12, 2014 at 10:19 pm, LipstickandCake said:

      Thanks Kate, just had this need to write it and share it. I felt dishonest keeping it from my readers. Absolutely overwhelmed by the response! xx


  9. May 12, 2014 at 12:58 pm, Angie Harrington said:

    Steph, you are so brave for posting such a personal story. Good on you for putting yourself out there. You are a fabulous gal and I have a feeling Lipstick & Cake is going to take you somewhere amazing. Lots of love xx


    • May 12, 2014 at 2:10 pm, LipstickandCake said:

      Thanks Angie, I feel the same about you (the fab bit and you going somewhere amazing) 😉 Hope we get to catch up very soon! Thanks again for your lovely words xxx


  10. May 12, 2014 at 12:15 pm, Rachel // One Beautiful Life said:

    I admire your strength and braveness so much for sharing this post Steph – you are truly inspiring. After having gone through something similar I can totally relate to everything you have said and the best thing to do is take time out for you when you need it. Can’t wait to see what’s in store and so excited we’re now connected! Sending love + good vibes your way honey – you’re going to rock it! xx


    • May 12, 2014 at 2:09 pm, LipstickandCake said:

      Rachel, I am so happy we connected, thank you for reaching out! It’s nice to talk to someone who has been through it, thanks for listening to me and sharing your words of wisdom! You’re going to rock it too, I can just tell! Bring on 2014, we’ll make it our year xx


  11. May 12, 2014 at 8:32 am, Elsa H said:

    So sorry to hear you’ve been going through such a tough time and you’re very brave sharing it. You seem to have a great group of family and friends supporting you.

    The blog looks great! Good on you for taking such a giant leap which looks like it’s paying off. I’m looking forward to hearing about all of your adventures – I might just live vicariously through you for a while I think. Xx


    • May 12, 2014 at 9:04 am, LipstickandCake said:

      Thanks Elsa, I am very lucky to have all these wonderful people around me.
      Thank you, I love working on it. Haha sure, go ahead! Keep up the good work on yours too, I am really enjoying your insta x


  12. May 11, 2014 at 11:08 pm, Karina B said:

    Steph you are such an amazing person and like I have told you before, I’m so inspired by you!! Good on you for opening up to your readers. Always hear for ya! Love ya! Xxx


    • May 12, 2014 at 7:45 am, LipstickandCake said:

      Thanks Kaz, you’ve been amazing! Thank you xx


  13. May 11, 2014 at 10:50 pm, Christina @ Mr and Mrs Romance said:

    Thanks for being so brave and opening up Steph. You are amazing and a wonderful friend to me. Here’s to some incredible adventures ahead xx


    • May 12, 2014 at 7:45 am, LipstickandCake said:

      Yes Christina, to incredible adventures! Thanks for being a wonderful friend to me too xx


  14. May 11, 2014 at 10:20 pm, Mama Stylista said:

    What a beautiful, brave and honest post. So glad to hear you’ve turned a corner and decided to continue to blog. Looking forward to sharing your journey. Love and hugs. x


    • May 12, 2014 at 7:44 am, LipstickandCake said:

      Thanks Mama Stylista, love and hugs back at you x


  15. May 11, 2014 at 10:14 pm, Christie Haines said:

    Stephy you powerful and strong girl. Good on you for letting this be known. Know that I love you and you are very loved. Don’t get lonely, your loved by so many especially me.Don’t let anyone get you down – your way to much of a bright and beautiful person to let anyone or anything kill your positive vibe. Love you gorgeous xxx


    • May 12, 2014 at 7:43 am, LipstickandCake said:

      Thanks Christie, and thank you for being such an awesome friend throughout this! Lots of love x


  16. May 11, 2014 at 10:02 pm, Lauren said:

    Well, I bet you hovered over the enter button for a while before posting this! But I’m glad you chose to share. I admire your strength so much Steph. You are a force to be reckoned with and I’m lucky enough to be part of your life. Woohoo!


    • May 11, 2014 at 10:08 pm, LipstickandCake said:

      Haha I sure did Lauren, sat on it for aaaages! Thank you, so lucky to have you in my life x


  17. May 11, 2014 at 9:37 pm, MsCritique said:

    You are so brave and I admire you so much. You are gorgeous and I’m so lucky to have such a beautiful friend like you. Shame on those that make one of the biggest and saddest things to happen to you their petty gossip. Onwards and upwards. I know wonderful things lie ahead! X


    • May 11, 2014 at 9:48 pm, LipstickandCake said:

      Thank you my dear friend. I couldn’t have gotten through this without you. Yep, onwards and upwards and bring on our exciting trip! x


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